Wordless Wednesday

Everyone's got to have one (at least)!

















This isn't part of my wordless wednesday but.. turn your volume up!




Tooo cute.

Children are good for something!

Rough week! I was sleep deprived. My postpartum check up did not go well at all so I have to go back in next week for tests. Lanie worried me one day enough to call my husband at work and make him come home early. And Jena seemed not to want to sleep.

5am Friday morning, I passed out from exhaustion and my husband took over until he went to work. I spent my day needing more sleep than a koala. While feeding Jena around 10 am, I noticed blood on Lanie's foot. Earlier in the week I found a deep cut on her toe that was scabbed over, so I thought it opened up again. I put Jena down for her nap and took Lanie to the room with the first aid kit. It wasn't the same cut, but a new one that's just as deep. My husband thinks it's cracked skin because her foot has some severe dry skin on it. Anyway, I clean it with wound cleaner, put antibiotic ointment on it and explain to her what a bandaid is and what it does. I give her a strawberry shortcake one to play with as I tell her that it will make her boo boo's better faster. I put the bandaid on her and she immediately starts crying. I had to put her in a footed sleeper so she won't take it off while she takes a nap...

Peace and quiet...TWO kids napping at the same time! Nap time for mommy!

1pm-- Lanie gets up. 1:30pm-- Jena wakes up. 2pm-- I'm breastfeeding Jena and Lanie says "Gotta Pee pee." So I tell her to sit and take her sleeper off, and then I'll meet her in the bathroom. She unbottons, then unzips...Then she notices the bandaid. She immediately starts crying and pointing at it saying "feeeeeeeeeeeeeet, feeeeeeeeeeeeeeet." I tell her it's okay, she can walk with it on but she refuses. She sat there for 20 minutes until I finished with Jena. I put her down and made Lanie stand and take 2 steps. After her 2 steps, she wouldn't move at all! She just cried "Feeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeet" so I put her on the couch where she remained, crying "feeeeeeeeeeeeeeet" and pointing to her bandaid until her dad came home! Then she started doing a pathetic little limp, refused to come down the stairs or walk to her chair without daddy carrying her. And what was I doing the whole time?



LAUGHING MY @$$ OFF! I figured if Lanie was going to stay put, I'd make dinner. The break didn't end there. Jena went to sleep as we started dinner, about 5pm. My husband let me take another nap after dinner. Jena stayed asleep and has remained asleep since 5pm. I woke her up at midnight to feed her, but she didn't make a peep and went straight back to sleep! That's my girl! Ok 1:37am... maybe I should go get more sleep while I can!

Wordless Wednesday

My postpartum self is in a picture.. don't get used to it!

Thinking about everything and nothing at all...

I haven't visited my moms house since August or September of last year. I can't even remember if I went to my dads grave or not. April will be 2 years since his death and I doubt I'll be able to make it back before then... So hopefully, I'll be going to his grave this weekend... without the kids, without anyone. That got me thinking... why do we bring flowers to the dead? When did that start and what was the original thought? My mom told me on Valentines Day she took a balloon there and let it go in hopes that it would reach him... We ALL know it won't though. Even she knows it, so doesn't false hope do more harm than good? If there is a spiritual life, certainly nothing from the living world could cross it. Hence why when we die, nothing else goes with us. I don't know... it's just a thought. I find myself scared to go to the cemetary for some reason. I even feel like the second I walk into her house I'll be struggling to fight back tears. I think of my dad often, but it doesn't seem to be enough to ward off the hurt of his death. Recently, a lot of memories came to mind about him, not all good ones. Not even most of them were good. Just a couple of them were sweet. Maybe it won't be as bad as I think.

Yesterday, I kept myself busy all day and got a couple of pictures on the computer:




















Today, I'm just tired and found a new way to blog a little more..... while nursing! It's not like I can do too many other things while nursing. Certainly not the dishes or the laundry. And that's all she wrote.... hope everyone has a lovely weekend.

Wordless Wednesday

What a week! Being a mother involves a lot of gross things.

Bee's one month appointment was on the 5th. They gave me an Rx of Zantac for her, told me to thicken her breastmilk with rice cereal and if that doesn't work, use the Zantac. Great. At the mercy of the pump again! On top of that, the pharmacy flavored it with mint, I didn't ask for that. And they gave us a useless dropper. Thank goodness we have one. It's been a week now, and the combination of the bottle and the Zantac have worked. I still breastfeed her at night, she only gets up twice at the most. If I breastfeed her during the day, I pump the milk out first. I hate to take away something that gives her so much comfort. And since it takes time to make milk, a little spit up in between isn't going to kill me. It's better than being soaked in it like I was before.

Tuesday was a week to the day that I noticed Bug had blood in her stool. So I called to ask what it could be and they said "bring her in." I hate that. I just had a question! But I took her in and they wanted a sample. The doctor explained to me what to do. I got the sample late Wednesday and took it to the lab yesterday. Apparently, it wasn't the right way to do it even though I did it as it was explained to me. Now I have to do it again. Oh so much fun.

Wednesday, the husband had a root canal. It was fun getting the kids ready all early in the morning [note the sarcasm] to get to Salibury.... a 20mile drive and sit in a very very small endontist office full of people with a car seat, diaper bag, toys, and 2 kids. Yeah! But his root canal went well and he wasn't in too much pain when we left. After getting all three fed and down for a nap, I had a doctors appointment. It didn't go well, I ended up getting sent to the lab for further testing for something else that I'll have forever, and have to take medication for until I die. That's always fun! It makes me want to throw a party! We had spaghetti that night and I completely forgot that Bee and tomato sauce don't mix. So she was gassy and spitting up all night. I've got to remember not to eat pizza and other stuff with tomato sauce. Tomatoes themselves don't seem to bother her.

Thursday night was the best sleep night this week. So I'm a little more rested but I think I need to sleep for 3 days straight! On top of it all, taking the girls to the doctor landed me with a sore throat and a fever. Add to that... Jon's got it! But the girls don't at least.

Thank you, Meredyth!

Last night was rough. The littlest bug had problems sleeping. She's got acid reflux and all she wanted was to be attached to me all night. She was inconsolable unless she was on me. It was rough, I think my breasts are going to fall off. But as she's here, attached to me... one of my best friends sent me an email:


"This is just too good not to pass on to all. Something absolutely positive for a change. I have repeatedly seen the breakdown of the cost of raising a child, but this is the first time the rewards listed this way. The government recently calculated the cost of raising a child from birth to 18 and came up with $160,140 for a middle income family. Talk about sticker shock! That doesn't even touch college tuition. But $160,140 isn't so bad if you break it down. It translates into:

* $8,896.66 a year,* $741.38 a month, or* $171.08 a week* That's a mere $24.24 a day!* Just over a dollar an hour. Still, you might think the best financial advice is not to have children if you want to be "rich." Actually, it is just the opposite.

What do you get for your $160,140?
* Naming rights. First, middle, and last!* Glimpses of God every day.* Giggles under the covers every night.* More love than your heart can hold.* Butterfly kisses and Velcro hugs.* Endless wonder over rocks, ants, clouds, and warm cookies.* A hand to hold, usually covered with jelly or chocolate.* A partner for blowing bubbles, flying kites* Someone to laugh yourself silly with, no matter what the boss said or how your stocks performed that day.

For $160,140, you never have to grow up. You get to:
* finger-paint,* carve pumpkins,* play hide-and-seek,* catch lightning bugs, and* never stop believing in Santa Claus. You have an excuse to:* keep reading the Adventures of Piglet and Pooh,* watch Saturday morning cartoons,* go to Disney movies, and* wish on stars.* You get to frame rainbows, hearts, and flowers under refrigerator magnets and collect spray painted noodle wreaths for Christmas, hand prints set in clay for Mother's Day, and cards with backward letters for Father's Day.

For $160,140, there is no greater bang for your buck. You get to be a hero just for:
* retrieving a Frisbee off the garage roof,* taking the training wheels off a bike,* removing a splinter,* filling a wading pool,* coaxing a wad of gum out of bangs, and coaching a baseball team that never wins but always gets treated to ice cream regardless.

You get a front row seat to history to witness the:
* first step,* first word,* first bra,* first date, and* first time behind the wheel.

You get to be immortal. You get another branch added to your family tree, and if you're lucky, a long list of limbs in your obituary called grandchildren and great grandchildren. You get an education in psychology, nursing, criminal justice, communications, and human sexuality that no college can match. In the eyes of a child, you rank right up there under God.
You have all the power to heal a boo-boo, scare away the monsters under the bed, patch a broken heart, police a slumber party, ground them forever, and love them without limits, so one day they will, like you, love without counting the cost. That is quite a deal!!!!!!!"





Sometimes I have to be reminded that a few sleepless nights filled with crying are farless memorable than what's to come. And in the whole month that Bee's been here, we may have had 6 or 7 rough nights. It's definitely worth the trade off of all of the above.



Happy birthday to me. I'm 25, feeling more like 35 right now. My husband got me a double stroller, and took me out to dinner. I was pathetic, I tried to get an alcoholic beverage.. a bay breeze and I couldn't drink it. I sipped it for the entire dinner. Then at the end of the dinner, I was maybe a quarter of the way through it when my husband took it and drank the rest of the 12oz's in 1 shot. I guess I've been a mother way too long. Everyone else gave me a check or cash. I got myself (with some money I was sent) a couple of things from Bath and Body works. They didn't have their signature scent, Sun-ripened Raspberries, which was what I wanted (go figure), but I found a new one that I love and is now my favorite. I also got a $12 lip tint for $3. They only had 1 left of the color I wanted but I'm in love with it and don't think I'll ever find that color again. I've been looking for a color like that for years. I was thinking that now that I have a double stroller, maybe I'll finally finish the trip to the mall that I started last week. Not likely now since I went to Kohls yesterday to get stuff to do the girls bathroom. Which means, I don't have money anymore. I had some when I went to the mall the first time, but it's all gone and then some!

Here is what their bathroom collection will look like:

They have this in their tub too...

We're planning on painting the bathroom a light green. It currently off white and has dark cabinets with a dark blue, burgundy, gold, and dark green bath collection. Here's hoping a lighter collection makes it happy, fun and less claustrophobic.

Bee is one month old today!


She can roll over
She's holding her head up really well
She wakes up only 1 time at night for 30 minutes
She was completely breastfed until last night
--- we had a few failed attempts at formula but I got her a new bottle and with some coaxing she finally took it.

I don't know why we gave her formula... I have a ton of breastmilk in the freezer. I guess it was quicker for my husband than thawing a bag. Bug was breast and formula fed at the same time. I think she's better off for it. She's had a small minor little cold and she's almost 2. No ear infections...not a single sickness. So we'll go the same route with Bee.


Speaking of Bug, her sister seems to be the apple of her eye. She thinks and talks about her constantly. It's cute, it's an unexpected surprise. I love it, she's already a little mommy! She's taken her big sister roll very well, she gives lots of kisses, hugs and even holds her so nicely. At one point, she did try to breastfeed her but not since I explained that only "mommy" can do that. Since then, she brings her dolls over to me and wants me to breastfeed them as well. It's interesting, but sweet nonetheless.

It's funny, I can't seem to sleep tonight. Both kids go down at 8, so Jena has been sleeping since 8pm, it's almost 1am and she's still sleeping. I remember feeling this way when Lanie started sleeping all night. It's pretty lonely when you're used to getting up. Maybe I'll be able to stop my brain from running laps around an imaginary track so I can fall asleep. I'll be 25 on Monday, and all I can think about is that this is the second time that I won't be having a conversation with my dad on my birthday. This is the second time that I can't show him my new baby. So lately I've been finding my thoughts with him....